So true!

Everything Matters: Beyond Meds

The way out of our cage begins with accepting absolutely everything we are feeling about ourselves and our lives, by embracing with wakefulness and care our moment-to-moment experience. By accepting absolutely everything, what I mean is that we are aware of what is happening within our body and mind in any given moment, without trying to control or judge or pull away. I do not mean that we are putting up with harmful behavior—our own or another’s. Nor do I mean that we are confirming the truth of a negative belief, such as “I am a loser.”

Rather, this is an inner process of accepting our actual, present-moment experience. It means feeling sorrow and pain without resisting. It means feeling desire or dislike for someone or something without judging ourselves for the feeling or being driven to act on it. — Tara Brach (read the rest here)

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Your Illusionary Past – Garret Kramer

This article is incredible. Taken from: http://garretkramer.com

Can your behavior become habitual? Yes. Can a habitual behavior originate from your past? Definitely. If you are struggling now, should you look to your past as the reason why you feel the way you feel, and for the cure? In my opinion, not for a second.

Indeed, the self-help world strongly disagrees. Virtually all therapists, life coaches, and counselors believe, and have been trained to believe, that conquering former traumas is the key to overcoming current difficulties. One famous self-help professional recently insisted, “The key to finding the truth is to go back to the past, to those haunting times, and resolving former traumas.” Oh boy, where do I begin?

Let’s try simplicity. If people delve into their past in order to explain or fix their current troubles, then they seek answers in the same misinformation that created the troubles in the first place. Or as Sydney Banks once said, “Going back to a troubled past is like putting your hand in a burning fire, pulling it out because it hurt, and then saying, ‘I think I’ll put my hand back in again’.”

The past no longer exists. Why do so many of us look to the past to explain our present troubles?

In short, the past is merely a memory carried through time, a thought. And like all thoughts, the past is not real. So if you attempt to solve your problems in this illusion, you’ll pretty much spin your wheels. As a personal example, for years I couldn’t figure out why at times I lamented my childhood, poor me; yet at other times, I relished it, lucky me. Same childhood, so why did I look at it in such dissimilar ways?

Then, one day I realized that my perception of my past was solely the result of the quality of my thinking and state of mind—which are always changing. Thus, it made no sense to look to my childhood as a concrete circumstance that had the ability to bring me down.

In other words, if I thought about my past one day and it made me miserable, and I thought about my past another day and it made me smile, it had to be something inside of me (my thinking) that was causing my despair or happiness. The past had nothing to do with it.

Your perception of your past is always changing. When you feel down, your past is problematic. When you feel up, your past makes sense.

Now, to be fair, I’m not saying that there are never times when a therapist takes a client back to a former ordeal and the client then finds clarity and feels more at ease. What I’m saying is that when this happens, going back to the past is not the reason. If the client’s thought system and level of consciousness are on the upswing at that moment, he or she will find tranquility no matter what the therapist suggests.

Here’s the bottom line about the past: If it had the ability to lead people to despair, then different individuals who experienced the same traumas would all be suffering now. Plus, your past misfortunes would affect you in the same way at all times. Of course, neither is the case.

To me, the self-help world needs to consider the negative impact of taking a person back to former low states of mind. It energizes and perpetuates suffering. Instead, let’s teach people that they perceive the past from the inside out; that the quality of their thinking and state of mind in the moment create all of their perceptions, including their perceptions of the past. Remember, challenging thoughts about your own life history will occur, but you don’t have to do anything about them—they are illusions—left alone they’ll wither away in no time.


Excellent Points

Everything Matters: Beyond Meds

We perceive the world in a particular way and confidently expect it to conform to its appearance. But we fail to recognize that certain aspects of the ‘reality’ that appear to us are nothing but figments of our own imagination. In this confusion a conflict ensues between the world as it is and the world as we believe it to be. And the more we insist on our infallibility, the more frustrated we become as the actual world again and again stubbornly refuses to live up to our expectations.Stephen Batchelor from Alone with Others: An Existential Approach to Buddhism

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Believe in the Ability

Believe in the ability. I love that quote.
What it means to me is to just believe that something is possible or capable. Not a guarantee that something will be done, but the ability is there.
I found this quote to be comforting in times of high anxiety, stress, and fearful / what if thought.

This new notion did not require me to have conviction, that I could handle these situations, but the ability is there. All I needed to do was have faith. This was much easier for me to grasp in some of my darker days, because I didn’t think I could get through anything.

Anything is possible. Just believe in the/a ability.


Emotions and their Influence

Understanding how your emotions influence your actions can ensure that you are always cognizant of why you make your choices. When you let your feelings drive you without knowing where they may lead you, the life you end up creating may be vastly different from the one you dreamed of. Recognizing the power our emotions can hold over us allows you to choose whether to follow their lead or to seek counsel from our rational mind first. Our emotions are meant to serve us, rather than be served by us. When you understand how your feelings may be driving you to express yourself today, you’ll be able to harness your emotions to help you further your cause, not hinder it.


I have shared some of why I love the breathing track so much, and how its changed my life more than I could imagine, but evidently, others have noticed too.

Yesterday my boyfriend and his mother were talking, and said I seem the happiest and most peaceful I have been in my whole life. The reason I think the breathing track is so effective is it touches my core issues. I spent time in 12 step programs, CBT, therapy and other groups. I feel the focus of these were on the symptoms, why I drank or why I had severe GAD. The track deals with the cause. It heals parts of me that nothing else worked for. No person, kind words or behavoral change worked as profoundly as the track. The acceptance and surrender practiced with the breathing track, touches all other parts of my life. I can let things flow, and in turn since I am not trying to control every detail through fear, things are falling into place better than ever imagined.

I also find I have immense gratitude for the little things, I went food shopping last night, and loved it. The fact that I get to go food shopping. This is no longer an anxiety riddled chore. Its enjoyable.

Oh one other thing – I always considered myself an impatient person. Well, Marty & I were talking today and impatience is the symptom. The cause is doubt and fear. That if something is left alone for a certain amount of time, something bad will happen (like my childhood) these realizations are so comforting. I thought relinquishing control was terrifiying, and in fact it is reassuring to the fact that I am not and never was ‘crazy’. Thanks for reading!

C PTSD - A Way Out

I have shared some of why I love the breathing track so much, and how its changed my life more than I could imagine, but evidently, others have noticed too.

Yesterday my boyfriend and his mother were talking, and said I seem the happiest and most peaceful I have been in my whole life. The reason I think the breathing track is so effective is it touches my core issues. I spent time in 12 step programs, CBT, therapy and other groups. I feel the focus of these were on the symptoms, why I drank or why I had severe GAD. The track deals with the cause. It heals parts of me that nothing else worked for. No person, kind words or behavoral change worked as profoundly as the track. The acceptance and surrender practiced with the breathing track, touches all other parts of my life. I can let things…

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Daily Om: Stronger than you know

Often we get anxiety for no reason as we are almost always stronger and more capable than we believe ourselves to be.

Our capacity to cope successfully with life’s challenges far outstrips our capacity to feel nervousness. Yet in the weeks, days, and hours leading up to an event that we believe will test our limits, we can become nervous. While we may have previously regarded ourselves as equal to the trials that lie ahead, we reach a point at which they near and our anxiety begins to mount. We then become increasingly worked up, until the moment of truth arrives and we discover that our worry was all for nothing. We are almost always stronger and more capable than we believe ourselves to be. But anxiety is not rational in nature, which means that in most cases we cannot work through it using logic as our only tool. Reason can help us recognize the relative futility of unwarranted worry but, more often than not, we will find more comfort in patterns of thought and activity that redirect our attention to practical or engaging matters.
Most of us find it remarkably difficult to focus on two distinct thoughts or emotions at once, and we can use this natural human limitation to our advantage when trying to stay centered in the period leading up to a potentially tricky experience. When we concentrate on something unrelated to our worry—such as deep breathing, visualizations of success, or aerobic exercise—anxiety dissipates naturally. Mindfulness is also useful as it provides us with a means to ground ourselves in the moment. Our guides can aid us by providing us with a focal point wholly outside of our own sphere.
The intense emotional flare-up you experience just before you are set to challenge yourself is often a mixture of both excitement and fear. When you take steps to eliminate the fear, you can more fully enjoy the excitement. Though you may find it difficult to avoid getting worked up, your awareness of the forces acting on your feelings will help you return to your center and accept that few hurdles you will face will be as high as they at first appear.